Retirement. It is finally here. I will officially close my practice at the end of August, and so I have begun a series of goodbyes. Hard goodbyes. I have said this many times, but I must say it again. Sharing the lives of others has been a privilege. The trials and joys, the heartbreaks and the victories, the endings and new beginnings have been my great joy. If you have been my client I want to share a little secret: you have helped me! It’s hard to explain, but it’s true. As a psychologist I am called to be both objective and relational. When we enter into therapy together, you allow me to walk part of your journey with you. And as I have entered your lives, I have been changed. Therapy is a sacred hour, and you have honored me by sharing your life with me.
I am not quite sure what my next season will look like. Some things are starting to take shape. I know I want some days just to do nothing except maybe read a good book. I am grateful that I have been allowed these bonus days with my husband since his illness. We are talking about things to do together, places we want to see for the first time and places we want to see one more time before we die. I have closets that need to be cleaned and things to be put in order. There is a big crate of photos that I need to organize. I want to spend more time with God, I want to write more, and I hope still get asked to speak. I want to spend more time with friends and family, doing fun things and making new memories. I’m thinking I might take up cooking again, but I’m not rushing into the kitchen!
But most of all, I want to be useful. My life calling has been to help the hurting, and I want to continue doing that, but in a less structured way. I’m not sure what that will look like, so I am just putting one foot in front of the other right now. And I am asking God to direct my steps and order my days.