Author: Fran Carona, Ph.D.

I am a wife, mother, grandmother, and licensed clinical psychologist.

MORE THANKSGIVING REFLECTIONS

Years ago I published this piece and I am revisiting today as I remember all my blessings.

My family knows this to be true: Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  Part of the reason is because it comes in my favorite season, autumn.  For me, it also is the start of a long holiday season.  I like to enjoy Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years for as long as I can.  And I have a tendency to run all those holidays together. I have been playing Christmas music since Halloween, and we will be eating our Thanksgiving turkey by the glow of the Christmas tree. That is why saying “Happy Holidays” is not offensive to me.  Oh I understand and sympathize with the argument Christians have with this phrase.  We want to put Christ back in Christmas.  And I do say “Merry Christmas” frequently.  But for me “Happy Holidays” refers to the entire holiday season that begins with Thanksgiving and ends with New Year’s Day, so I am not put off by those greetings.  In fact, if you want to wish me a happy Monday, I’ll take that too.

The other reason I prefer Thanksgiving is the lack of commercialism, although that is now being tested.  It is not about shopping or giving gifts; it is not about the making or spending of money.  Thanksgiving is about gratitude for what I have instead of thinking about what I want or need.  It makes me mindful of the many blessings God has given me.  It keeps me God-focused rather than me-focused.  It fosters contentment.  

The Pilgrims understood our need for gratitude.  They suffered more adversities than I ever will yet they knew it was important to set aside one day and thank God. They found reasons to be grateful in spite of the many graves they dug. In 1623 Governor William Bradford declared that everyone should assemble together “and render thanksgiving to ye Almighty God for all His blessings.”

Psychologists who have studied gratitude have found that gratitude is directly correlated with life satisfaction, peace, and joy.  Individuals who cultivate and express gratitude have fewer health complaints, reduced stress, and are generally less self-absorbed.  They even sleep better! I frequently challenge my clients to keep a gratitude journal. Doing so fosters wellness, optimism, and generosity.  Dr. Robert Emmons, the world’s leading expert on gratitude states, “The fabric of gratitude is deeply woven into the human experience.”  He has found that there are two parts to gratitude: acknowledging the goodness in life and recognizing the source of that goodness.

I believe God created us with not only the capacity to experience gratitude, but also the need to express it.  He commands us to give thanks because giving thanks is good for us! Our Father knew that his children would reap psychological, physiological and interpersonal benefits by cultivating a grateful heart.  He does not need our praise; it is we who need to praise Him.  I have noticed something in my own life.  Maybe it is not a scientific fact, but it is something I have observed.  The more I praise Him for His blessings, the more blessings I receive.  Maybe that is not actually the case; maybe I am just more aware of the blessings I already have.  Either way, it fills my heart with joy. The knowledge that I have enough is a wonderful thing.  

As I write these words, I am aware of the losses and hardships many of us have experienced this year. You may find it difficult to give thanks in the midst of loss, heartbreak, and adversity, but give thanks anyway. Praise God in the midst of your storm, when your heart is broken, when you are between a rock and a hard place. Praise may not change your situation, but it may change you in the midst of your circumstances.  

I think there is something wonderful that happens with corporate praise, when we thank him together with our families, our church families, and our nation.  It binds us together.  It brings us in touch with the things we have in common and directs our attention away from the things that divide us.  That is why we need a National Day of Thanksgiving.  When we gather together on Thanksgiving Day, let us thank God for our blessings and acknowledge that He is the Source of everything good in our lives, in our families, and in our country.

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

And all that is within me, bless His holy name.

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

And forget none of His benefits;

Who pardons all your iniquities,

Who heals all your diseases;

Who redeems your life from the pit,

Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion;

Who satisfies your years with good things,

So that your youth is renewed like the eagle.  Psalm 103:1-5 (NASB).    

Things Upstairs Are Still Working

Here in Oklahoma, where I live, we have had a week of brutal, scorching, unrelenting heat. Even walking across a parking lot to the car is draining.  And this is the week our air conditioner decided to break down!  We just had our regular maintenance a few weeks ago, after which the downstairs began getting warmer and warmer.  We had the service company come out and suspiciously, our coils were cracked and Freon was leaking.  Also the unit was frozen, so we had to turn it completely off for a day.  The good news is that our coils were under warranty but the bad news is that labor is not covered.  At 106 degrees, they had us over a barrel.  My husband was trying to explain all this to me and told me that the upstairs unit was still working.  Five days and $1000 later, my house is nice and cool. 

I realize that this is a first world problem.  I think about the people who can’t afford any air conditioning or the electricity to run it.  Some people work outside in this heat and our poor AC technicians had to work in my 135-degree attic to get us up and running.  We are blessed and I know it.  Blessed that our house never got hotter than uncomfortable. It got just hot enough to make us irritable.  We are blessed that we had money in the bank to pay for repairs. And especially blessed with a second unit that still ran.

“Things upstairs still work.” That is what the technicians told us.  And how true that is!  When life turns up the heat and your problems are so energy-zapping you feel weary and exhausted, things upstairs still work.  God is in control.  He told us in His word that we would have trials.  Fiery trials. But He also told us that He has a purpose in our trials and that trials have endings. 

And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. 1 Peter 5:10

I don’t like trials any more that I like this relentless heat.  I do not believe that God causes all our problems.  We live in a fallen world, and there is evil.  Sometimes we make dumb choices., and there are consequences to those choices. And sometimes life just happens.  The other day our 20-year old granddaughter was driving home from Nashville on I-40 when she had a blowout.  One of our scariest fears.  It was 106 degrees and she was stuck on the center median.  Big 18-wheelers were zooming by so closely that she could feel a whoosh of air every time one passed.  But things upstairs were still working.  God sent a state trooper to calm her and change her tire. In that awful heat!  A real hero and public servant.

Lord, help me to remember these things the next time I face a problem. Before I press the panic button I need to remind myself that things upstairs are still working.

The LORD himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.” Ex. 14:14 NLT

Sidebar: Today we have had a good soaking rain and cooler temperatures.  There is more heat ahead, but eventually fall will arrive.

The Things We Keep

Jerry and I have spent the last week packing up our kitchen and dining room as part of a kitchen remodel.  This is something we have wanted to do for some time, but at the same time dreading.  It has been a big job, but we are finally ready for the painter who hopefully will show up today.  It was our plan to pare down and get rid of the things we no longer need or use.  Oh man!  Do we ever have a lot of stuff!

This is not our first pass at this trimming down our things.  We moved into this house 23 years ago, and got rid of a lot of things then.  It’s strange, but I still think of this as our new house.  But over the last 23 years we (okay, I) have managed to fill it up again.  

Deciding what to keep and what to donate has been a challenging task. How did I end up with so many loaf pans? 

Me: I wonder how many loaf pans to keep?

Jerry: When is the last time you cooked a loaf of anything?

Me: Well, I might make a meatloaf.

Jerry: We buy those at Costco now.

Oh yes.  He is right.  Costco makes a mean meatloaf. I am thinking I might keep one loaf pan.  Just because.

I had a moment when I was deciding what to do with Aunt Fannie Belle’s parfait glasses.  The layer of dust on them proved that I never use them, but getting rid of them seems so disloyal to her.  My Aunt Fannie Belle was my grandmother’s sister, and together they were the twin pillars of a chaotic childhood.  My safe people.  Aunt Fannie Belle lived in Houston, and my sister and I spent many summers with her.  Like her name suggests, she was a southern belle, and knew how to entertain.  I can remember those parfait glasses filled with wonderful concoctions when she hosted her bridge club or her circle group from church. 

My sister and I exchanged a few texts discussing the parfait glasses.  “Keep the memories, but let go of the parfait glasses,” she suggested.  Perfect!  I think about Aunt Fannie Belle almost daily, and obviously I don’t need the glasses to remind me of her.  Hence, the dust. The memories are what we keep.  And there are so many!

The older I get, the closer I am getting to Heaven, where wonderful reunions await.  I have a recurrent dream of taking a road trip with my sister, grandmother and Aunt Fannie Belle.  In the dream we are laughing and having the best time! I can’t imagine road trips in Heaven, but who knows?  To paraphrase Carrie Underwood, maybe Jesus will take the wheel.    

TURNNING POINTS

On Wednesday, June 21, we in the Northern Hemisphere observed the summer solstice, the longest day of the year.  On this day the sun’s rays strike the Earth’s surface at a more direct angle in the Northern Hemisphere than they do in the Southern Hemisphere.  After the solstice, we begin to lose about a minute of daylight per day until the winter solstice occurs and days begin to lengthen again.  The summer solstice is a day of relief for me because I like knowing that the days are getting shorter, even though this decrease in daylight will not be appreciable for some time.  It is just a small comfort to me.

I realize that I am probably in the minority when I say that summer is my least favorite season.  If you know me then you know that fall is my favorite followed closely by winter.  I love the day we go off daylight savings because there is a big jump to longer nights.  There is something I love about being snuggled in a cozy room, maybe with a fire going, while the wind howls in the dark outside.  I can’t say that I love being cold, but I really hate being hot.  At least in the winter I can add more clothes or wrap up in a blanket.  

Although it may be meteorologically incorrect, I think about the summer solstice in this way.  God, who created the sun, knows just how much of it we can take.  It is like He is saying, “ This is the turning point.  If I give the earth more days of sun, it would burn up.”  Even though summer is just beginning, and we in Tulsa, Oklahoma have sweltering days ahead, they won’t last forever.  Fall will come, followed by winter.  In our family, we set our beginning of fall by our granddaughter Hannah’s birthday, which is September 20.  Her mother, our daughter, will tell you when she went into the hospital to deliver Hannah it was summer, and when she came out it was fall.

Just as God knows how much heat (or cold) we can take, He also knows how much stress we can take.  I had a pastor once who said that every trial has a beginning and an end.  I am wondering if there is also a midpoint, a place where God turns the trial toward a conclusion.  You may be thinking about a trial that ends in death and there seems to be no turning point, no time of relief.  But maybe there is and it just goes unnoticed.  Perhaps in these struggles that end in death, there is a point where the soul turns toward home.  That moment when God calls us to Himself.  “You have had enough of this world.  Now come to rest in me.”

But most of our trials do not end in death.  Isn’t it a comfort to know that even though we may not be able to see it, our ordeal may be coming to an end?  When we think we can’t go another mile or endure another day, we dig in and press on.  We take comfort in the knowledge that Jesus is walking with us through our valleys and He knows when to turn things around.  And while we are enduring, God is chiseling away, sculpting Christ-like character into us (Rom. 5:4).  If you are going through a valley right now, take heart.  Be encouraged by the words to this beautiful song by Selah:

When the valley is deep
When the mountain is steep
When the body is weary
When we stumble and fall

When the choices are hard
When we’re battered and scarred
When we’ve spent our resources
When we’ve given our all

In Jesus’ name, we press on
In Jesus’ name, we press on
Dear Lord, with the prize
Clear before our eyes
We find the strength to press on

Dear Lord, with the prize
Clear before our eyes
We find the strength to press on

In Jesus’ name, we press on
In Jesus’ name, we press on
Dear Lord, with the prize
Clear before our eyes
We find the strength to press on

We find the strength to press on
To press on

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Daniel L. Burgess

Press On lyrics © Wb Music Corp.

 https://youtu.be/AKJ6dmKV0Gc

You’re Not Listening!

I remember as a mother of young children sometimes it was difficult to get their attention.  “Listen to my words,” I would say.  As a mother, I was always talking, teaching, admonishing, and training them with an ongoing dislogue. But for those important moments, I would pause and make sure they were listening.  With three girls (and I made 4), it was hard to get a sentence in.  In our family we come from a long line of very verbal women.  We say we have the Peterson gift of gab.  My grandmother and her sisters were all Petersons by birth, and they all could talk circles around anyone else who wanted to speak.  

My poor husband didn’t have much of a chance to speak with all these girls.  But then, men don’t use as many words as women.  Accordinng to studies (and who is counting all these words?), women speak about 20,000 words a day compared to 7000 for men.  Getting a man to listen, at least at my house, requires reeling him back in from wherever he mentally goes.  “Jerry, I need to tell you something.”  

We have been facilitating a study at our church for couples, and this phenomenon of checking out has been the subject some humorous connversations.  We decided that men have a nothing box where theygo to tune out. 

Me: “What are you thinking about?”

Him: “Nothing.”

How is that possible?  I, like most other women, start thinking before my feet ever hit the floor in the morning.  But men swear that they can empty their minds and not be thinking about anything.  That is why it is necessary to get their attention before speaking to them about something important.

I have said before that my word for 2023 is quiet.  As a part of cultivating quiet, I am trying to listen more.  Listen intentially.  I was reading about listening earlier this week in a book called The Sacred Slow.  The author, Alicia Britt Chole, asserts that not listening is a form of idolatry.  Over and over in the Bible, God admonished his people to listen to his words.  And their were consequences when  they refused to listen. He finally sent them into exile, a 70 year time out.

The word listen is translated form the Hebrew word, shama.  It appears 1161 times in Scripture.  Evidently God thinks listening is important.  But this kind of listening is more than just hearing a sound.  It requires us to come out of our boxes and pay close attention.  To be able to do this, I must say no to some things.  We tend to want God to add the discipline of listening to our already crowded minds.  But God is calling us to purge some things and to fast from others, in order to hear His voice.  Even Jesus had to get away by Himself.  Sometimes God has to lead us into the wilderness to get our attention.

So I am working on slowing down and being quieter, disciplines that do not come easily to this Peterson descendant. I would prefer to do these things voluntarily rather than get a heavenly time out.  

Lord, give me ears to listen and feet to obey.    

A SCARCITY MENTALITY

One of my guilty pleasures in semi-retirement is reading.  I read a variety of things including both fiction and non-fiction, and I am usually reading several books at a time, including The Bible.  It amazes me how God pulls strands together from diverse readings to teach me what he wants me to know.  This week I have been wrapping up a study of Revelation, begun (actually on the second book) the Lucy Barton series by Elizabeth Strout (Thank you, Amanda Herrold!) and continuing a very unhurried read of The Sacred Slow by Alicia Britt Chole. 

The theme of my readings this week has been “a scarcity mentality.” Oh, I haven’t run across that phrase, but that is what stands out to me, and I am feeling a bit chastised by The Lord.  I know where this way of thinking began.  There were times in my childhood when things were scarce.  So today, when I am trying to de-clutter and rid my house of so many things, I am paralyzed.  “What if I need this? But this belonged to my Great Aunt Fannie Belle! This holds too many memories.”  And the clincher, “I might lose enough weight to wear this again.”  These are a few of the thoughts that keep me up to my ears in stuff, but I am working on it.  My niece, Leanne would say we should curate our homes.  I like that idea, but have a difficult time implementing it. 

This morning as I was reading Sacred Slow, the author describes how one of the first reflexes a newborn baby displays is a gripping reflex. If we place an object in a newborn’s palm, she will close her fingers around it and hold on.  In fact, babies develop this reflex before they are even born, and I guess some of us carry it throughout our lives. 

“In the beginning we open our eyes and instinctively tighten our grip around all that is placed I our hands.  In the end, others close our eyes, and our hands are incapable of gripping a single thing. Perhaps on the other side we may see this life as a journey from keeping to releasing, from gripping to entrusting.” Chole

This is where the book of Revelation comes in.  In the end, none of my possessions will matter.  The only things I can take with me to Heaven will be my loved ones who have accepted Christ as Lord and Savior.  

“A clenched fist displays the delusion of ownership. An open hand reveals the realities of stewardship.” Chole.

Lord, help me to live with open hands.

Chole, Alicia Britt. The Sacred Slow: A Holy Departure from Fast Faith. Nashville, W Publishing, 2017.

MOTHER’S DAY MUSINGS

I wrote these words some years ago, but have updated them to reflect a growing family and my own advancing years.

The older I get the less Mother’s Day is about being honored and celebrated and the more it becomes a day of gratitude.  I am so very grateful for the privilege of being a mother.  Let me say at the beginning, I recognize that Mother’s Day is a difficult holiday for many.  Perhaps you have lost your mother; maybe this will be your first Mother’s day without her.  Perhaps the two of you have a difficult relationship.  I get it.  I remember many years standing in the Hallmark store with tears in my eyes thinking, “There is not one Mother’s Day card for my mother.”  It also may be difficult because you desperately want to be a mother and for whatever reason this has not happened.  Maybe you have lost an unborn child or children and this day is a painful reminder.   And tragically, you may have given birth to a child who later died.  My heart breaks for you.

I am richly blessed with three wonderful daughters.   As my wise sister has often reminded me, most of us get two shots at the parent child relationship.  The first opportunity is with our parents, and then later with our own children.  Even if you don’t have the relationship you would like with your parents, you can still resolve to have a good relationship with your own children.  Sometimes our best parenting lessons come by learning what not to do.

The greatest Mother’s Day gift I have ever received is the gift of being a mother.  I can still vividly remember the overwhelming love I felt for my firstborn daughter as she was placed in my arms.  And the surprising relief that I could feel the same amount of love for a second and a third daughter.  And don’t even get me started about my grandchildren!  A mother’s love is never divided: it is multiplied.

I am blessed that my grown children live nearby and I get to see them often and watch the cousins grow up together.  I really like the women my girls have become, and I enjoy spending time with them, even if it is just a quick pop-in visit.  And I am, so proud of them as mothers.  They have blessed me with nine beautiful grandchildren, three greats, and another on the way.  Our family just keeps growing.  It is more than I ever could have wished for!

There are many gifts in motherhood, but I think the greatest is that it truly teaches us about the heart of our Father.  I can remember the frustrations I felt as a young, overwhelmed mother.  There was nothing I could take to God that he had not already experienced.  “Oh Lord, they are always wanting something!” (Yes, I understand.  My children only come to me when they need something.”)  “They don’t appreciate how much I do for them!”  (Really?  How often do you thank me for all I do for you?”)  As they got older I complained that they were too busy for me.  I certainly didn’t surprise God with that one!  (“Hmmm.  My children are too busy for me too!”)   Of course, I always realized that God was referring to me.  As a parent, God has been so patient and loving with me. 

There are sacred responsibilities and privileges that come with being a mother.  Nurturing them to know and obey the Lord is the most important.  Thankfully I know my children will spend eternity in heaven.  At this time in my life, I think prayer is my most important assignment.  When my children were younger, I had the illusion that I was in control.  As they got older, I began to see how little control I actually had.  I had to begin what would become a continual process of letting them go and surrendering them to the Lord.  Now, I must do the same with my grands.  They have wings, although there is a part of me that would like to keep them under my wings.  That is where prayer comes in.  I remind them frequently that I am praying for them and that there is nothing the devil hates worse than a praying grandmother.  One day, when they have grandchildren of their own, I hope they will remember me that way…as a praying grandmother.      

When my babies were little, my precious grandmother would tell me, “These are the best days of your life.  One day you will want them back.”  She was so right.  The days are long, but the years are short.  Oh, I don’t want to go completely back to the child-rearing years.  But I would just like to have one day, one hour with them as children.  One more handmade Mother’s Day gift.    I would love to have them snuggle up next to me and just be with me.  Maybe that is what my Father wants: a day to just be with me.  A day when I don’t come to Him with my want list.  A day when I just enjoy His presence.   

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.  Psalm 127:3 (ESV).

SUNDAY

It’s Friday.  The disciples are shocked, scattered, and shattered.  It wasn’t supposed to be this way.  They thought there was a future, a plan.  They risked everything they had to follow Jesus.  Now that plan is destroyed.  Terrified, they wonder what is next.  Will the Roman soldiers be coming for them?

We have all had our Fridays.  A midnight phone call, a pink slip at work, a bad diagnosis, an “I don’t love you any more.”  We are devastated.  Brokenhearted.  This is not the way it is supposed to be!  We had a plan, we were all in, and now that plan is in pieces.  We wonder if there is another shoe to drop.  

It’s Saturday.  The disciples are in pain.  Mary must have been in agony.  Still in shock, they are constrained by the laws of what might be their last Sabbath Saturday.  They cannot even care for the body of their Lord.  And God seems silent.

After devastating life events, we too experience those dark Saturdays.  Caught between the familiarities of what were our lives only a few days ago, we are now in uncharted territory.  We don’t know what to do.  We are spent and exhausted.  We can’t even imagine moving forward. And God seems silent.

It’s Sunday!  He is risen!  His disciples wonder if it could possibly be true.  Everything changes.  There is now hope and a future.  They get a new plan, and gradually they understand that this was the plan all along.  They get new marching orders.  They rejoice and sing a new song.

 We finally get a Sunday.  That which was dead comes to life again.  We discover that we can move forward and put one foot in front of the other.  We don’t go back to where we were, but we get a different kind of good, one that we could never imagine.  God gives us a new plan and a new direction, one that we slowly realize as our destiny from the beginning.  We get a new purpose.  We can actually be happy again.

Lord, thank you for Sundays!    

YOU’RE INVITED

Spring seems to bring a round of special occasions and invitations.  There are weddings, showers, graduations, and other events that take place before many of us disperse for summer.  In our family, we have a round of birthdays coming up, but come to think of it, every month is birthday month in our big family.  You may be receiving invitations to one event or another every week.  But I wonder if you have ever been uninvited?

Have you ever heard about a party or special event and wondered, “Why wasn’t I included?”  You may wonder why you are not an A-lister or part of the in crowd.  Why are you left out?  Maybe you are the wrong color or gender; maybe you wear the wrong clothes, or don’t live in the right neighborhood or drive the right car.    And the big lie you believe: “You are not good enough!”  If you buy into that lie, I wonder if you have ever worn yourself out trying to get good enough.   It’s exhausting.  

I was thinking about these things this morning, Good Friday.   It is always the heaviest, hardest day of the year for me as I remember how Jesus suffered.  But in many ways it is the best day of the year.  I guess that is why it is Good Friday.  Because of today I am invited to a party like no other.  John writes about it in the Book of Revelation.  I can’t think of enough superlatives to describe it, so I will compare it to another big event that is coming up.  And no, I am definitely not invited to this one!  In a few weeks the world is going to witness the big elaborate coronation of King Charles.  England will pull out all her jewels and pageantry.  But it will pale in comparison to the coronation of King Jesus.  I am invited!  And my invitation came because of Good Friday.

In every other religion I can think of, man has to work himself up to a god.  Keep enough laws, do enough good things, stay away from all the “don’ts” and then maybe, he will be good enough to reach his god or whatever form of peaceful place he has imagined.  Christianity is the only religion (and I hate that word) where God comes down to man.  God says, and I paraphrase, you can’t get good enough to reach me; you can’t do enough good things to be in relationship (better word) with me.  You are separated from me because you are sinful and I am holy.  So I will come down to you.  I will come in the form of a human, live a sinless life, and suffer and die on a cross to pay for your sins.  I will make a way, and it is the only way because without the shedding of blood there is no remission of sin (Heb. 9:22).   And not only that, I am going to conquer death by rising from the grave and going back to Heaven to prepare a place for you. 

Here is the invitation: “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends”  (Rev. 3:20).   You may be wondering how to RSVP to your invitation.  All you must do is agree with God that you are a sinner, believe that Christ died for your sins and ask for forgiveness.   Then turn away from your sins.  If you would like to open your heart to Jesus on this Good Friday, you can pray something like this.  The words are not what are important; it is the attitude of your heart.

Lord, I confess to you that I am a sinner. I believe Jesus Christ is Your Son. I believe that He died
for my sin and that you raised Him to life.
I want to trust Him as my Savior and follow Him as Lord,
from this day forward. Guide my life and help me to do your will.

I pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.”

Things Are Not as They Seem

This journey through my “golden years” continues to surprise and challenge me.  My newest issue is my vision.  I am going to finally get cataract surgery.  “You will love it,” my friends say.  “You will wonder why you waited.”  “It’s a piece of cake,” they say.  I have barely begun the process and I have already encountered what is for me, a big problem.  Bifocals.  You may be thinking, “I’ve worn bifocals for years.  What’s the big deal?”

I have worn monovision contact lenses for years with few problems.   With monovision, the dominant eye is corrected for distance while the other eye is corrected for near viewing.  I thought I would be able to wear my contacts right up until surgery, but I was told I would need to be in bifocal glasses for a few weeks so that the eye surgeon can get accurate measurements of my corneas.  Evidently wearing contacts causes a problem with measurements. 

I picked out a cute pair of frames and thought wearing them for a few weeks would be no problem.  Oh boy, was I wrong about that!  My brain, used to monovison, and my eyes, looking through bifocal lenses, do not want to work together at all!  Shapes are distorted, I can’t tell distances, and my sense of balance, already wobbly, is now even more compromised.  I know this computer screen I am looking at is rectangular, but it looks more like a parallelogram.  I know where I keep small salad plates, but when I pull them out they look like oblong platters.  I know there is a step down into the garage, but if I don’t hold onto the wall I am going to miss it.  I feel like I am living in a fun house with distorting mirrors and uneven floors.  And I have picked up a few bruises by trusting my eyes.  It is taking awhile for my brain and my eyes to sync.  In the meantime I must trust what I know to be true, and not rely on my distorted vision.    

I was thinking about how life is not always as it seems.  For the community of Covenant Presbyterian Church and School, Monday morning looked like a normal day.  Tucked into a pretty, upscale neighborhood in Nashville, the school looked like a safe place for children and staff.  Parents dropped their children off thinking they would see them again in the afternoon.  The pastor may have been working on a Palm Sunday message, not imagining that his nine-year old daughter would be murdered.  Life looked safe and normal, but the evil no one could see was ready to strike.

How do we cope when tragedy strikes?  When, like the tornado victims in 

Alabama, all we can see is loss and devastation?  When hope seems gone?  It is during those times that we must trust what we know to be true.  Here is what I know:

  • I know that God is good.  All the time.  Even when the world is full of evil, God is still good.
  • I know that Jesus told us that we would have troubles as long as we are on this earth.  But I also know that He promised we would not have to face those troubles alone.  That He would walk with us through our hard places.
  • I know that God can bring good out of the worst.  Even when life seems hopeless and black, there is still good.  Even when our pain is screaming so loudly that we can barely hear anything else, God’s voice is stronger still.  “I love you.  I will care for you.”
  • I know that God is sovereign.  He is still on the throne and He is in control.  Even when a tornado rips our world to shreds, He is not caught off guard.  He still has a plan for our welfare and His glory.     
  • I know that even when the world strips us of everything we hold dear, He will still supply all our needs.
  • I know that in our darkest hours, we must walk by faith and not by sight.